Speaking of Birthdays in Your Forties...

I happened upon this interview from charming British artist, writer, comedian, Noel Fielding.   In this interview, he discusses turning forty.   It is so true.   It also made me think more about social media, especially Facebook.   Facebook, Instagram, Twitter--even blogging for those whose main purpose is to build an audience-- just seem to encourage/tempt a perpetual state of being in one's thirties, as they are described below.  I wonder if social media may alter normal stages of human development?   There's a thesis for someone.  

"In your twenties, you're trying to work out who you are.  
In your thirties, you're trying to tell everyone who you are
and then, your forties, you don't care."

It was almost automatic the day I turned 40 last year.   I still care deeply about people, but I just don't worry so much what they think of me.   I'm still working on it, but several things really changed.   I became less frightened of my own personality and temperament, meaning I became more likely to speak my mind.   I tend to the sarcastic in humor and I worried about being taken the wrong way when everyone around me just seemed so sweet.   I stopped saying "yes" to extra things I didn't want to do and to things that took too much time from my priorities right now: my family and my health.   If I declined politely and with those explanations, or others such as a conflict in schedules, it wasn't my place to worry if someone was offended.   I am still limited in what I can do, so I don't feel guilty about choosing carefully.

My health issues have meant that I was isolated some of last year.   I learned much about myself through that whole experience.  It's difficult to adequately express the love and gratitude I feel for friends who kept in contact, just to ask how I was feeling or to offer help and encouragement.   It is overwhelming to feel so loved by them.

My fortieth year was a rough one, but I learned a great deal.   I hope I'm a bit wiser, and more caring and empathetic.   As I face my first year at home without a child with me during the day since 2004 and this new chapter in my life, I can only imagine what my forty-first year will hold.   I'm concentrating on all that I have to be thankful for and that list is quite long.   Here's to all there is to come and thanksgiving for the good and the grace to have borne the rough.



  1. I thank God for your wonderful self, dear Terri! You are such a treasure! I love the insights that you share, your beautiful love for your mama & your wonderful family, your generous heart & your wit. =) May this year be an especially blessed one for you, dear friend!

  2. The world needs Terri :) And I am so thankful for how you have honestly shared about your challenges. Your life is a gift to all those you have touched. I look forward to spending time with you in your 41st year of life!!!!! :)


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